Today, had a little gathering with Adelyn, ah Biao and Jiaen.....Nikki and Jing was supposed to come as well but in the end, the former said something crop up and latter had to go for a rehearsal for her tomorrow's gig....sigh....
poor JE had to wait for 2 hours! i was caught up with the hotel reception and A was caught in a jam. RB called to say he will be late and soo all of us was late. It was a fun filled session with all the sharing about LS, KP, E, KW gossip and not forgetting SM. well, other than JE, all of us know about the gossips in tb, so for the one hour or so, it was a poor tb bitching session....
and i realised something about the people working for M. they are people who might package their words and present it nicely to the audience. It takes time to digest and truly decipher their meaning and whether they meant what they say. And for me, took 1 and half year of searching before i decided that hey, this place is not gonna fulfil my dreams....i'm getting out of it....
and i'm glad i did....God bless.....
FF msg me to ask me to give her a hug tmr....huh? what happen? checked out her blog and realised its about Shifu...well, Shifu is preparing to buy a ring....i guess the moment has come. The moment where she knows will come one day and this day will not be a pleasant and easy day. I guess in life, there's really a difference between expected and when something really happens as per expected. When something expected really happens, its like driving a nail right into your heart..."you nailed it!!!" It's painful.....
But i believe that at least, the ending and direction is clear. both parties know that finally, our uncertainty has come to an end. It's a relief at times. Look at things positively and you will see the light.
Ended the day taking a train with JE back together. She is in a new relationship 2 months old where both she and her bf are first timers. I've shared my experience an dknowledge about BGR with her...i think, when a relationship is fresh, everything appears to be fresh, nice, sweet, can be forgiven and understandable. But after 24months spent together, the relationship is infused with different components. The consideration for each party is still there, but most importantly, there are certain things that guys and gals need to understand about each other.
First important theory----Guys and Gals are really different. In terms of physical, mentally, spiritually and all....guys can be stone at times and need constant nagging and pointers to understand the gals' needs.
For me, i think gals are simple. you just have to understand that gals need constant loving, care and concern. Paise her when she doll up, give model answers at times and etc. see? easy right? hahaha
For guys, give them face at times and let them feel that they are in charge. I guess its an ego thing but giving them such 'benefits' are ok at times but at a considerable and acceptable level. TOo much of it will get their head swell. They are 'straight' beings where gals need to be direct at times. Tell them straight in the face what you want and of cos, to note the tone. Still need to give them face....aiyo...
anyway, i think today, i had an interesting gathering. Filled with fun, joy and laughter. It's a miracle how one gathering can turn out.
If you are being asked to attend a gathering, i would suggest to all to attend as one never knows what you will get out of it......
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Saturday, August 26, 2006
New discoveries...
Over the whole week, discovered some new 'theories'
Had a talk with ff on one of the nite and realised something....i like myself better when i listen more....
Over the years, due to some things, i wanted to be the initiator..hence, through the process, i've become more independent...and definitely more impatient..and prolly because of this, i talk more than i listen...and i happily 'share' with all around me about my happenings and grumbles....and i did not realise that this will create irritation with someone....b wrote in one of the email that he do not want to listen to all the office politics and all...*wake up call* It was after the talk with ff that i realised that b was really refering to me. All the while, i've talk too much that slowly and unknowingly, realised that i know little of some of the people close to me.....
Hence, i've decided to make myself a better person by listening more....
I guess, one will only know more and benefit more by sharing and listening....
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next topic.....
b n i seem to have reached another limit of our friendship. or i should say that, our friendship must have been a shallow one. Y? cos he din really appear to be concern about the way our friendship goes. He called ff when ff reply his email to clear the air....i've always have this feeling that b and ff and wz friendship is a deep one...one that have gone through ups and downs...one that he treasure....through his little gifts for them on their bday....i could sense it....
hence, i guess, the little MY incident that happen that night has only confirmed to me that our friendship is shallow. One that does not have common ground. ff and b has at least yoga. wz and b has the passion for jazz and the music line....me? nothing i can think of now.
Actually, does friendship needs to have a common interest between the frens in order to justify the friendship. My answer? NO! y? cos i believe that if two can be friends meeting every week for many years, they must have develop something within and deep down inside as well that justify the friendship and this development would be different from the initial idea that brought the friendship together. in me and b case. the initial idea - lindy
guess i realised that its really playing with fire when one is light hearted towards another's passion.
i've always treated lindy as an avenue for me to showcase myself. and of cos, an avenue for being socially involved. it's something i've enjoyed, especially the people element of the dance.
so in order to make myself feel better, i'm ignoring his attitude towards me. His cold....
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
actually i have soo much to say, but guess, tonight is not the nite, so that's all for such inner thoughts....
Had a talk with ff on one of the nite and realised something....i like myself better when i listen more....
Over the years, due to some things, i wanted to be the initiator..hence, through the process, i've become more independent...and definitely more impatient..and prolly because of this, i talk more than i listen...and i happily 'share' with all around me about my happenings and grumbles....and i did not realise that this will create irritation with someone....b wrote in one of the email that he do not want to listen to all the office politics and all...*wake up call* It was after the talk with ff that i realised that b was really refering to me. All the while, i've talk too much that slowly and unknowingly, realised that i know little of some of the people close to me.....
Hence, i've decided to make myself a better person by listening more....
I guess, one will only know more and benefit more by sharing and listening....
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next topic.....
b n i seem to have reached another limit of our friendship. or i should say that, our friendship must have been a shallow one. Y? cos he din really appear to be concern about the way our friendship goes. He called ff when ff reply his email to clear the air....i've always have this feeling that b and ff and wz friendship is a deep one...one that have gone through ups and downs...one that he treasure....through his little gifts for them on their bday....i could sense it....
hence, i guess, the little MY incident that happen that night has only confirmed to me that our friendship is shallow. One that does not have common ground. ff and b has at least yoga. wz and b has the passion for jazz and the music line....me? nothing i can think of now.
Actually, does friendship needs to have a common interest between the frens in order to justify the friendship. My answer? NO! y? cos i believe that if two can be friends meeting every week for many years, they must have develop something within and deep down inside as well that justify the friendship and this development would be different from the initial idea that brought the friendship together. in me and b case. the initial idea - lindy
guess i realised that its really playing with fire when one is light hearted towards another's passion.
i've always treated lindy as an avenue for me to showcase myself. and of cos, an avenue for being socially involved. it's something i've enjoyed, especially the people element of the dance.
so in order to make myself feel better, i'm ignoring his attitude towards me. His cold....
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
actually i have soo much to say, but guess, tonight is not the nite, so that's all for such inner thoughts....
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Primary School Gathering
Cai Huang was my 初恋情人 when i was in Primary 5. Can you imagine? My love life started when i was like 11 years old? haha....Actually, i do not remember much about why he was my puppy love then but it was definitely sweet. The long hours on the phone, and mind you, it's LOOOOOOONNNNNNNNGGGGGG hours, easily clocked 5 to 6 hours...toking about rubbish and nothing under the sky...haha....
Well, we lost contact for 10 plus years and i vaguely remembered that he sms or called me one fine day. From there, i got his msn and we msn at times....there was once where we were toking about the past. Actually i dun remember much from the past but surprisingly he did. Reminded me certain things and oh, a tape....At that young age, i actually recorded my rendition of "Miss you like crazy" on a cassette and gave him...haha....he threatened to bring it out and play to all the rest when we have a chance to meet but after a while, he admitted losing the cassette when he shifted house....phew.....cannot imagine that...well the only thing i have from him is a cup and his photo pasted on my autograph book. He has a very boyish look and i remembered that he was once being bullied by older boys cos he was rather small size then...
Well, yesterday, i had a primary school gathering and finally met him after say 14 years....it's weird that in such a small country, i did not met him once on the road but well, it's still fated that we managed to contact each other....i saw his wedding photos once when we msn and he still has the boyish features and handsome lah....haha...
So after 14 years, when i finally saw him, he's shorter than me, but still handsome...haha...the gathering in the end, had only 4 of us. Zhihao, Meihua, me and him. We had dinner at this place called Ministry of Food (MOF) at Marina Square which serves japanese food and were toking away....but actually it was just Zhihao toking away....he was toking about his work, his stay at London, the gals he had and blarblarblar.....Before i go on...must highlight that MOF service is not that good...the waiter and waitress are abit blur and mix up the orders. So, we werent that pleased with the service....
After that, went to cafe cartel at Marina Square...boy...it was the longest walk i took to go cafe cartel. Cos, Zhihao suggested going Breeko at Bugis and walking there....but he needs to buy a shirt for his Brother.....so we went up to a shop and he took sooo long to buy a shirt....pengz...this man is mafan!
then he leaded the way and we walk to citilink, cross the bridge to suntec and in the end say go milenia walk...arh!! we could have walk directly there from marina square....best part is when we were walking along the road, saw cafe cartel opposite and in the end decided to go cafe cartel....pengz....
so we spend almost like 1 hour there and LISTEN to Zhihao brag about the gals he had, how he two timed lah....show us photos taken in London and the gals he had....boring...
at the end of the 4 hours, couple of conclusions
1. Zhihao - Portrayed to be too over confident....it's supposed to be a gathering but it appears to be more like his sharing session....One who is not matured lah....too playful
2. Mei hua - not much to tok about...the whole nite she was rather annoyed with Zhihao.
3. Cai Huang - not tall, handsome, think he a bit sian, likes Milk Shake (Same flavour as me....STrawberry), and definitely more matured than Zhihao...
Well, conclusion...i'm glad to go...though it's pure Zhihao's sharing session, at least i get to meet Caihuang...to see if he has changed.... All the best frens...
Well, we lost contact for 10 plus years and i vaguely remembered that he sms or called me one fine day. From there, i got his msn and we msn at times....there was once where we were toking about the past. Actually i dun remember much from the past but surprisingly he did. Reminded me certain things and oh, a tape....At that young age, i actually recorded my rendition of "Miss you like crazy" on a cassette and gave him...haha....he threatened to bring it out and play to all the rest when we have a chance to meet but after a while, he admitted losing the cassette when he shifted house....phew.....cannot imagine that...well the only thing i have from him is a cup and his photo pasted on my autograph book. He has a very boyish look and i remembered that he was once being bullied by older boys cos he was rather small size then...
Well, yesterday, i had a primary school gathering and finally met him after say 14 years....it's weird that in such a small country, i did not met him once on the road but well, it's still fated that we managed to contact each other....i saw his wedding photos once when we msn and he still has the boyish features and handsome lah....haha...
So after 14 years, when i finally saw him, he's shorter than me, but still handsome...haha...the gathering in the end, had only 4 of us. Zhihao, Meihua, me and him. We had dinner at this place called Ministry of Food (MOF) at Marina Square which serves japanese food and were toking away....but actually it was just Zhihao toking away....he was toking about his work, his stay at London, the gals he had and blarblarblar.....Before i go on...must highlight that MOF service is not that good...the waiter and waitress are abit blur and mix up the orders. So, we werent that pleased with the service....
After that, went to cafe cartel at Marina Square...boy...it was the longest walk i took to go cafe cartel. Cos, Zhihao suggested going Breeko at Bugis and walking there....but he needs to buy a shirt for his Brother.....so we went up to a shop and he took sooo long to buy a shirt....pengz...this man is mafan!
then he leaded the way and we walk to citilink, cross the bridge to suntec and in the end say go milenia walk...arh!! we could have walk directly there from marina square....best part is when we were walking along the road, saw cafe cartel opposite and in the end decided to go cafe cartel....pengz....
so we spend almost like 1 hour there and LISTEN to Zhihao brag about the gals he had, how he two timed lah....show us photos taken in London and the gals he had....boring...
at the end of the 4 hours, couple of conclusions
1. Zhihao - Portrayed to be too over confident....it's supposed to be a gathering but it appears to be more like his sharing session....One who is not matured lah....too playful
2. Mei hua - not much to tok about...the whole nite she was rather annoyed with Zhihao.
3. Cai Huang - not tall, handsome, think he a bit sian, likes Milk Shake (Same flavour as me....STrawberry), and definitely more matured than Zhihao...
Well, conclusion...i'm glad to go...though it's pure Zhihao's sharing session, at least i get to meet Caihuang...to see if he has changed.... All the best frens...
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Today's performance at WCT
hehe, today's performance was stressful man...
Y? cos both ff and myself did it with like 2 saturdays and 1 national day break practice and it's scary when one is not fully prepared...
msg ff early in the morning and told her that i'm counting down.....deep down, i'm really thankful to her cos i felt she did it for me...my performance 'itchiness' started since Sea Jam...thanks dear if you reading this.....i guess, such challenge can only be done by both of us as we are a bit nuah and not soo perfectionist....ask Ms You Win aka WZ, or B, the performance will never happen with soo little practice....
the day was packed with lots of work at the office but still managed to get to SRC at 8+....the crowd was good and quite a good mixture....
Started with a small lindy class and then performance on tap by brian......
Here's a photo of tap.....it's where one puts main emphasis on the tapping sound of the tap shoe and it's the kinda CHarlie CHaplin do...
Then it was me n ff....sweat man.....we were dress black and white, with caps and suspenders..(hmm is this how u spell it...ah....nevermind lah...) tot we look really like those new yorkers with caps and stylo milo...
Anyway, the performance started and ended in 2 and a half mins later.....the floor was slippery and there were only 2 thoughts while performing
1. Remember all steps
2. Not to fall!!!
maybe another point, that is to SMILE....it's really important especially after today's performance, that i realise a smile can work wonders....cos ff forgotten quite a bit of steps and acted along the dance to 'pretend' to do something special.....soo funny...but overall, i'm glad the reviews are good...thank god....
Cheers man!
Anyway, today is the day where we tok to B for more than 2 sentences since that incident.....great feeling....it's as if re-knowing someone.....
and i would like to say, b, you gave a more interesting class than S today.....keep it up!
Y? cos both ff and myself did it with like 2 saturdays and 1 national day break practice and it's scary when one is not fully prepared...
msg ff early in the morning and told her that i'm counting down.....deep down, i'm really thankful to her cos i felt she did it for me...my performance 'itchiness' started since Sea Jam...thanks dear if you reading this.....i guess, such challenge can only be done by both of us as we are a bit nuah and not soo perfectionist....ask Ms You Win aka WZ, or B, the performance will never happen with soo little practice....
the day was packed with lots of work at the office but still managed to get to SRC at 8+....the crowd was good and quite a good mixture....
Started with a small lindy class and then performance on tap by brian......
Here's a photo of tap.....it's where one puts main emphasis on the tapping sound of the tap shoe and it's the kinda CHarlie CHaplin do...
Then it was me n ff....sweat man.....we were dress black and white, with caps and suspenders..(hmm is this how u spell it...ah....nevermind lah...) tot we look really like those new yorkers with caps and stylo milo...
Anyway, the performance started and ended in 2 and a half mins later.....the floor was slippery and there were only 2 thoughts while performing
1. Remember all steps
2. Not to fall!!!
maybe another point, that is to SMILE....it's really important especially after today's performance, that i realise a smile can work wonders....cos ff forgotten quite a bit of steps and acted along the dance to 'pretend' to do something special.....soo funny...but overall, i'm glad the reviews are good...thank god....
Cheers man!
Anyway, today is the day where we tok to B for more than 2 sentences since that incident.....great feeling....it's as if re-knowing someone.....
and i would like to say, b, you gave a more interesting class than S today.....keep it up!
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
part time DJ gig...flop
well, today finally receive a call from ah T to tell me that boss decided to take me down....
that includes my Saturday 9 to 2pm slot and 搏客达人 pre-recorded programme。
I've expected it....but that doesn't lessen the impact it has on me...i've sent numerous sms to BC, RB then FF. first to call RB....guess as he was the one who recommend me, prolly he really wants to know what happen...
well, i've expected it cos
1) Last sat, the minute i finish the 10am news slot, ah T da ge came in to say, 'huh, how many people did you say died in the typhoon in Zhejiang?' ....i knew it that its coming......somehow feel that i was being monitored....when he left the room, he said," pls jiayou. got quite a number of ppl commenting on your news reading...."
at that moment, a gong sort of strike me.....hence 10.30am 八卦流行乐 sound bland i think.....i've tried to keep the spirit up and hide it but i guess it sound not the upspirit....
2) That day when ah B tried to intro someone to ah T da ge, ah T said' is it like the last time that one? how's the command of mandarin?' The conversation happen in the room where im in and being sensitive, i thought it could be me that ah T was hinting.....
maybe i'm sensitive but i felt that cos i noe deep down my command of mandarin is not good as well...
my mandarin is not powerful nor bad. i can manage a full mandarin conversation of simple words without the influence of other language but i know that this is not enough....come on....you think being a DJ is easy? it's super hard!
actually, i've tot about quiting since i'm not up to it, not prepared, din improve much blarblarblar, but the procrastination kills......and in the end, i was asked to step down.....
Ah T mentioned that i din have to go down on saturday..that is like huh immediate dismissal? i din even get to say goodbye.....but on 2nd tots, gd too, i wouldnt know what to say too......
Ah B called me the moment i send the message and ask me about it.....and how i was, and whether my cancer nature is taking effect.....told him im rather ok lah....i know how much gold i have in the bag....so....
But this incident sort of gave me a wake up call......lessons learnt
1. Learn to say NO when you are ask to do something real time and when everything you say, is being heard by thousands and when YOU ARE NOT PREPARED or UP TO IT
2. Learn to work hard or at least strive when you have not say no to point 1 else, you'll just be smack by reality one day and well, who to blame? oneself lor.....
After the call, i email J n J, A chua, turtles and i got all replies except the one i'm waiting for.....sigh, although i know he is in msia, he is working, he might not receive the sms, he is busy, he does not know how to reply......but hey! i'm upset cos he din reply till 7+ in the evening.....
y does the reply always come late or sounds disappointing? reminded me of the time when i fell...the same type of disappointment.....
now that my saturday's morning are free, it gives me more time to zzzz.....ah B ask if i want to go on Sunday to be his guest again and if im free continue to record his programme too......well, i noe the disappearance is weird and that though i dun mind gng, i just dun feel like to do it, now.....need to sleep and forget.....
anyway, tomorrow's the day for me and fern to perform weizhen's charleston routine and we have to do it good....cannot throw face away..... so wish me luck...
i've move on....life is full of failures and one just have to pick themselves up and move on....
that includes my Saturday 9 to 2pm slot and 搏客达人 pre-recorded programme。
I've expected it....but that doesn't lessen the impact it has on me...i've sent numerous sms to BC, RB then FF. first to call RB....guess as he was the one who recommend me, prolly he really wants to know what happen...
well, i've expected it cos
1) Last sat, the minute i finish the 10am news slot, ah T da ge came in to say, 'huh, how many people did you say died in the typhoon in Zhejiang?' ....i knew it that its coming......somehow feel that i was being monitored....when he left the room, he said," pls jiayou. got quite a number of ppl commenting on your news reading...."
at that moment, a gong sort of strike me.....hence 10.30am 八卦流行乐 sound bland i think.....i've tried to keep the spirit up and hide it but i guess it sound not the upspirit....
2) That day when ah B tried to intro someone to ah T da ge, ah T said' is it like the last time that one? how's the command of mandarin?' The conversation happen in the room where im in and being sensitive, i thought it could be me that ah T was hinting.....
maybe i'm sensitive but i felt that cos i noe deep down my command of mandarin is not good as well...
my mandarin is not powerful nor bad. i can manage a full mandarin conversation of simple words without the influence of other language but i know that this is not enough....come on....you think being a DJ is easy? it's super hard!
actually, i've tot about quiting since i'm not up to it, not prepared, din improve much blarblarblar, but the procrastination kills......and in the end, i was asked to step down.....
Ah T mentioned that i din have to go down on saturday..that is like huh immediate dismissal? i din even get to say goodbye.....but on 2nd tots, gd too, i wouldnt know what to say too......
Ah B called me the moment i send the message and ask me about it.....and how i was, and whether my cancer nature is taking effect.....told him im rather ok lah....i know how much gold i have in the bag....so....
But this incident sort of gave me a wake up call......lessons learnt
1. Learn to say NO when you are ask to do something real time and when everything you say, is being heard by thousands and when YOU ARE NOT PREPARED or UP TO IT
2. Learn to work hard or at least strive when you have not say no to point 1 else, you'll just be smack by reality one day and well, who to blame? oneself lor.....
After the call, i email J n J, A chua, turtles and i got all replies except the one i'm waiting for.....sigh, although i know he is in msia, he is working, he might not receive the sms, he is busy, he does not know how to reply......but hey! i'm upset cos he din reply till 7+ in the evening.....
y does the reply always come late or sounds disappointing? reminded me of the time when i fell...the same type of disappointment.....
now that my saturday's morning are free, it gives me more time to zzzz.....ah B ask if i want to go on Sunday to be his guest again and if im free continue to record his programme too......well, i noe the disappearance is weird and that though i dun mind gng, i just dun feel like to do it, now.....need to sleep and forget.....
anyway, tomorrow's the day for me and fern to perform weizhen's charleston routine and we have to do it good....cannot throw face away..... so wish me luck...
i've move on....life is full of failures and one just have to pick themselves up and move on....
Sunday, August 13, 2006
my little twin nieces
oh, think i've not blog for a very long time....
on the 26th July.....other than mx bday, it was the birth of my little two nieces....
i used to be afraid to carry little infants, but when it comes to these two, somehow the courage appear miraculously...
Presenting, Amelie!!! The elder one...
and....Kathlyn.....
Well well, both are 3 minutes apart and they are soo small and cute.....
But poor thing....they got chicken pox, together with my sis within 2 weeks of birth and are hospitalised....sis commented that they prolly got it in the hospital....and i've been advised not to appear as i've not had my share of chicken pox before.....
well, i went to carry them, feed them during their incubation period and god noes if i'll kanna....
keep my fingers cross.....
also, the hospital bill is killing sis....u noe, my agent had advised me to get myself a hospitalisation insurance just in case and that was wat i did .......never noe what will happen....so if you reading this and still not get yourself covered by a hospitalisation insurance...better start doing something...
on the 26th July.....other than mx bday, it was the birth of my little two nieces....
i used to be afraid to carry little infants, but when it comes to these two, somehow the courage appear miraculously...
Presenting, Amelie!!! The elder one...
and....Kathlyn.....
Well well, both are 3 minutes apart and they are soo small and cute.....
But poor thing....they got chicken pox, together with my sis within 2 weeks of birth and are hospitalised....sis commented that they prolly got it in the hospital....and i've been advised not to appear as i've not had my share of chicken pox before.....
well, i went to carry them, feed them during their incubation period and god noes if i'll kanna....
keep my fingers cross.....
also, the hospital bill is killing sis....u noe, my agent had advised me to get myself a hospitalisation insurance just in case and that was wat i did .......never noe what will happen....so if you reading this and still not get yourself covered by a hospitalisation insurance...better start doing something...
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