Tips for rainy season....

Has been raining for more than 3 consecutive days.....some places flooded, some not soo bad....but generally, all areas are wet.

Have few encounters in the rain that i thought i want to share the conclusions i've derived against each.

1. DO NOT STAND closed to places especially where cars passed by and can create big waves of water.

I happened to pass by this cross junction every day on my way to work and i sweared that you have to stand at lease 10m AWAY from the edge or else, risk having free baths

2. DUN BE A HERO.

If it's cold, please wear thicker clothes to keep you warm. Or risk falling sick.....

3. Ladies, show your legs...

Haha, i'm implying to wear skirts.....dun think you would want to get your pants wet for the rest of the day, right?

4. Waterproof shoes, show yourselves....

As it implies, wear shoes that are waterproof. Ensure that the base does not have holes for the rain to penetrate. Especially if you are wearing covered shoes and socks. Else good luck

5. Your head might be big enough to cover your body, but umbrella is still required.

（大头大头，下雨不愁。你有雨伞， 我有大头。）

haha....i dun think anyone will really believe that having a big head will shelter one from the rain right? So, please bring an umbrella. You will be thankful

6. Calling cabs?

Get ready all the numbers in your handphone in case you need the numbers. But most of the times, when its pouring, taxi queues are long, hotlines are hard to call. Good luck if you managed to call one.


Guess more or less, the above should be handy......

Christmas season.....

This is the season of giving. As we celebrate the birth of Christ (but how many of us actually know how this day comes about? or really celebrate for this birth? hmmm), where many start to flock to different shopping malls with the thoughts of buying a gift, be it big or small, sending cards to send their wishes to their friends, i've passed by this new shop at Vivocity that i think worth recommending.

This shop is found on level 2 of Vivocity named, Build a bear.

Build a bear? what do we do there? Basically, as the name implies...build a bear. When someone gives you a bear or those bears that you see off the shelves, we've never thought about how this bear comes about and whether we can personalise it. This shop has opened my eyes to building a bear. The raw material is the bear itself. There are many bears of different furs, materials, grades and of cos different animals. Some are the traditionally bears but some are like rabbits etc. You choose your own desired bear, stuffed it with cotton (using a machine of cos) to the desired nice hug factor and start to dress up the bear. Boxers, clothes, spectacles, roller skates, ribbons and many other accessories to dress up the bear.

Process...

Step 1: Choose Me - you choose from the selection of animals

Step 2: Hear Me - you can add sounds with the ready messages or record your own

Step 3: Stuff Me - you add the stuffling and do a special procedure...what's that? see for yourself

Step 4: Stitch Me - off to stitch up the bear

Step 5: Fluff Me - the new toy is given a 'spa' and brush

Step 6: Name Me - you can give a name to your fren and have a birth certificate printed

Step 7: Dress Me - this is the costly part where you can choose your accesories for the bear and each accessories is priced

Step 8: Take Me Home - take your new fren home in a carrying case

and tata! new fren is borned.....





This is the final product of two of my colleagues. On the left cost SGD30+ and right, SGD40+.


Cute, arent they?


They might be a little costly, but it's a special gift, personlised.

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Happen to see this choco Santa Claus while shopping.....




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Phew, soo many more presents to go.....wish me luck!

Counting down to Christmas!!!

GMSS Closing Ceremony

A day after this official day, my Secondary School will official move out of the old campus and to the new campus and will be known as Clementi Woods. Many memories float back to my mind when i went back...not forgetting meeting up with the teachers and friends.

This will be a school, where i will always remember those days.

A group of us at the study corner.....

Those were the days................

I miss Netball!!!

對的人 - The correct person

Was first introduced to this song when i went KTV with Jiaen and gang. It seems like the impression that they gave me when the song was dedicated was it was a 'sing then die song'. Which simply means that the vocal range for this song is wide and after singing this song, most probably, you will see or experience two scenarios. 1st, the singer's vocal chords give way, 2nd the listener's ears went deaf...scary....

In the end, it was really as expected but i must say, this song is very meaningly and has a nice melody.....hereby the lyrics...(pardon those who can't read mandarin)

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對的人 - 戴愛玲
曲︰KEITH STUART
詞︰姚謙
編︰KEITH STUART

你問在我心中　是否還苦惱
那次受傷　否決了愛的好
謝謝你的關照　我一切都好
一個人　不算困擾

＊愛雖然很美妙　卻不能為了寂寞
又陷了泥沼

＃愛要耐心等待　仔細尋找　感覺很重要
寧可空白了手　等候一次　真心的擁抱
我相信在〔這個〕世界上　一定會遇到
對的人出現〔在眼角〕

那次流過的淚　讓我學習到
如何祝福　如何轉身不要
在眼淚體會到　與自己擁抱
愛不是一種需要　是一種對照

重唱　＊,＃

能願意為了一份愛付出去多少
然後得到多少並不計較
當我想清楚的時候　我就算已經準備好
放手去愛　海闊天高　WO WO WO WO YEAH

重唱　＃,＃

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I like the the pre-chorus that says "愛雖然很美妙　卻不能為了寂寞 又陷了泥沼"

It's very true. "Love, may be amazing, but we should not fall into the mud because of loneliness"....and i fully agree on that. In different stages of our life when we meet 'the' person, we experience different things and see light differently. It really depends on when, who, where you meet the person, that will affect the future of the relationship.

And hence, the chorus states "愛要耐心等待　仔細尋找　感覺很重要 寧可空白了手　等候一次　真心的擁抱 我相信在〔這個〕世界上　一定會遇到 對的人出現〔在眼角〕"

"One must be patient and look for Love carefully. Trust your feel, it's important. I would rather go empty handed and wait for a true relationship. I believed, i will definitely meet the 'correct' person, in time to come"

Such a beautiful melody and well written song. Simple and meaningful.

Here's the link to the video of the song posted in Youtube. Enjoy......

www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_Wnnm8e8eo - 69k

A 'happening' day to and at East Coast

Date: 17Dec06

Was supposed to go cycling with BC's family at East Coast. There would be his parents, two cousins and the little 'devil' xin1ling2 (little 2 year old niece). We had planned to meet at 9.30am at the bus stop nearest my place but due to the little devil still having her beauty sleep at 9.20am, we decided to delay till 10.30am.

Just when all of us arrived at the bus stop, it started drizzling......sigh....

Actually, had a bad feeling when i woke up to find that it is not as bright as it should be at 8+ in the morning, but having promised, decided to join the gang for an outing.

Upon alighting the bus, it was still drizzling all the way till the moment we step out of the tunnel to arrive at East Coast. No choice, decided to take a break at MacDonald's since we have kids with us and they should be drenched in the rain...

However, even after the little break we had at MacDonalds, it's still drizzling......sian...

Next hideout, Arcade....(amusement park with video games)......This is a place where almost all kids would love to go. (no? maybe only my era?)

Had a try at the Sniper game. I always have this thing about Sniper based games. It's rather exciting and challenging. Even had a game of dance, the four boxes game? Saw the two cousins playing para para dance and i was like, wow, not too bad for being able to follow the moves at that age.....guess im old....

Anyway, by the time we finish our arcade session, it is STILL DRIZZLING.....

Sigh, is it a sign that we should abort the cycling idea to just go shopping?

In the end, spent the next hour, bowling......I seriously think that bowling is an interesting and happy game where the group will have fun, laughing at each other's throwing pattern, and not forgetting encouraging each other when someone scores a strike or spare. This is the first time bowling with his family and i guess, not too bad after all.

Finally when the whole game ended, we decided to just go ahead with the cycling amidst the drizzle.

Chose our bikes, cycled out for about 400m? Just after the first bridge over the canal, guess what happened? It starting pouring!!! Made a mad dash for the nearest covered sheltered that happen to be preoccupied by a BIG family having BBQ. In the end, all of us were STUCK in that sheltered for the rest of the time. So much for cycling.....

It was then again, 3 adults trying to return 4 single bikes and 1 double bike in the rain. BC and his dad cycled one each and brought another back. BC then walk back and both of us cycled the remaining 2 bikes. By then, it was 3+ in the afternoon....

Hungry, tired and slightly wet.....guess its not really a good idea to go cycling at East Coast in December. Bad timing.

This whole month was pouring almost everyday and literally the whole day.

Sigh, i hate rainy days when im planning to go out......

Rain rain go away........

Laughter derived from discussion on 'chocolate'

Had a conversation with the two ladies, my ktv kakis....

MX asked, “我们说一朵花， 一口气， 一立米。那么，屎是用什么量词来形容呢？“

HX and me, replied at the same time, 一陀！

Bingo! thats the correct answer.....arent the two of us smart.....however, MX was telling us about how she has replied when asked the same question and why that reply. Basically she used the word 堆 to describe and was 'describing' why that word. Her theory was simply because SXXT is always like "that kinda" shape etc....and can you imagine when that word is used, ti just means things of different shapes and sizes are dumped together in a big pool? Grossed...Boy, three ladies then started to talk about this 'chocolate' and me being the 'creative' one, was giving a lot of ideas of why MX uses that desciption.

Actually, its interesting how people chose their words. In cases where you cant explain the meaning of an unknown word or how an unknown object looks like, we will instinctively use words to describe and try to explain. Guess it should work for most...... but for this particular question, the choice of word can really lead to crazy ideas and thinking.

Guess it helps to widen our vocab or words to avoid being the ’laughter biscuit‘.....

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A grossed conversation i had this evening......

Meaningful stories...(Edited version)

Was going through my emails and found this attachment with three very meaningful stories.....

Enjoy.....

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第1个故事 小孩的心 - First Story, Thoughtfulness of a child


有一位单身女子刚搬了家，她发现隔壁住了一户穷人家， 一个寡妇与两个小孩子。
(There's a single lady who has just shifted house. Her neighbour is a poor family of a widow and her two kids)

有天晚上，那一带忽然停了电，那位女子只好自己点起了蜡烛。没一会儿，忽然听到有人敲门。
原来是隔壁邻居的小孩子，只见他紧张地问：「阿姨，请问你家有蜡烛吗？」
(One night, there's a blackout in the area. That lady had to light up candles in her house to see. A while later, she heard someone knocking at the door. It was the neighbour's little child. The child ask, "Auntie, do you have candles?")

女子心想：「他们家竟穷到连蜡烛都没有吗？千万别借他们，免得被他们依赖了！ 」
於是，对孩子吼了一声说：「没有！」
(The lady was thinking, "Are they poor to the extent that they do not even have candles? Better not lend it to them, for they might be dependent on me in future! Hence, she replied to the child, "NOPE!")

正当她准备关上门时，那穷小孩展开关爱的笑容说：「我就知道你家一定没有！」 说完，竟从怀里拿出两根蜡烛，说：「妈妈和我怕你一个人住又没有蜡烛，所以我带两根来送你。」
此刻女子自责、感动得热泪盈眶，将那小孩子紧紧地拥在怀里。
(Just as she is about to close the door, that poor little kid smiled warmthly and replied,"Just as i thought. You do not have candles." With that, he took 2 candles from his pockets and said,"My mum was worried that you would not have candles since you are staying alone and asked me to bring 2 for you." At this very moment, the lady felt guilty and was touched. Her eyes were nearly filled with tears of touched and hugged the kid tightly in her arms.)

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第2个故事 纯真的心 - Second Story, A pure heart


有一个小镇很久没有下雨了，令当地农作物损失惨重，於是牧师把大家集合起来，准备在教堂里开一个祈求降雨的祷告会。
(In a little town, it hasn't been raining for a long time. This has cause great losses to the farmers as harvest was bad. Hence, the priest gathered all and prayed in the little chapel for it to rain)

众中有一个小女孩， 因个子太小，几乎没有人看得到她，但她也来参加祈雨祷告会。就在这时侯，牧师注意到小女孩所带来的东西，激动地在台上指著她说：「那位小妹妹很让我感动！」於是大家顺著他手指的方向看了过去
(In the midst of the crowd, there is a little girl. As she was short, she was hardly noticed. At this very moment, the priest noticed her presence and the things that she brought to the session and was excited and pointed to her on the stage, "That little girl has touched me deeply."

牧师接著说：「我们今天来祷告祈求上帝降雨，可是整个会堂中，只有她一个人今天带著雨伞！」大家仔细一看，果然，她的座位旁挂了一把红色的小雨伞； 这时大家沉静了一下，紧接而来的，是一阵掌声与泪水交织的美景。
(He continued,"Today, we are all gathered here to pray for rain. However, in the whole chapel, she is the only one who came with an umbrella." Indeed, she has placed a red umbrella beside her. There was silence in the chapel, and not long after, thunders of applause with tears in the eyes of all was heard and seen"

有时我们不得不说：小孩子其实一点都不「小」，他 （她）们其实很「大」！他（她）们的爱心很大！他 （她）们的信心很大
(We should not deny at times that kids though young, their kindheartedness and confidence are truely big)

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第3个故事 我们只不方便三小时 - Third Story, we are only inconvienced for 3 hours


那天跟老公幸运地订到了票回婆家，上车后却发现有位女士坐在我们的位子上，老公 示意我先坐在她旁边的位子，却没有请这位女士让位。我仔细一看，发现她右脚有一点不方便，才了解老公为何不请她让出位子。
(Was lucky on that day where hubby managed to get the train tickets back home. Upon boarding, we realised that there was a lady who sat on one of our seats in the train. Hubby asked me to take the other seat first and did not ask the lady to give up her seat, wrongfully taken. After taking a deeper look at her, i realised that her right leg was handicapped and realised hubby's good intentions)

他就这样从嘉义一直站到台北，从头到尾都没向这位女士表示这个位子是他的，下了车之后，心疼老公的我跟他说：「让位是善行，但从 嘉义到台北这么久，大可中途请她把位子还给你，换你坐一下。 」
(And with that, hubby stood the whole journey from Jiayi station to Taipei station and without even mentioning to the lady about the wrong seat. After alighting the train, i've told him, "Dear, although giving up your seat is a good deed, but the journey is soo long. You could have asked her politely to give the seat back to you in the middle of the journey.")

老公却说：「人家不方便一辈子，我们就不方便这三小时而已。」听到老公这么说，我相当感动，有这么一位善良又为善不欲人知的好老公，让我觉得世界都变得温柔许多。
(His reply was, "Her inconvenience is a lifetime long and ours, 3 hours". After hearing that, i was touched, that i have such a caring, thoughtful and sacrificial husband. Makes me feel that the world is filled with soo much warmth...)

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心念一转，世界可能从此不同，人生中，每一件事情，都有 转向的能力，就看我们怎么想，怎么转。
我们不会在三分钟内成功，但也许只要花一分钟，生命从此不同。

(Just by changing your way of thinking, the whole world will appear differently. In one's life, every matter has the chance of changing his direction of progression. It all depends on how we think, how we believed. We might not succeed in 3 minutes, but the time we spend on a minute, can change our fate)

Paying bills

Had a short conversation with my mum and a little unhappy with what she says....

The story goes like this....The only man in my house wants to keep track of the payment of the utilities bill. The lady boss of the house is not happy for the fact that she is deemed responsible for paying the bills and yet, could not choose her mode of making the payment as the man is not happy that she pays and not update him on the payment status. She feels that since she make the payment, why should she share the receipt of the payment and be restricted by how she should pay for the bill.

I agree with lady boss to certain extent cos since YOU are not paying the bill and choose not to pay, why should i be restricted by how i make the payment.

But, on the other hand, why cant she just pay the bill and let him know that she has paid?

Argh...in the end, the utilities bill is three month overdue and cost over $200+.

My conclusion, they are two childish people and i decided to pay instead. Though im poor this month, i cannot tolerate the idea of me returning home one day without water and electricity!!!

PLEASE GROW UP!!!

A sharing session with Wei Wei

Wei Wei is someone that i got to know through Weizhen and Fernie....She's a dancer at Jitterbugs studio as well.....

She happened to learn Lindy when i was in the recuperating stage of my knee and hence, i'm not too close to her....

However, we had some interaction at Sea Jam this year and because of the fact that i was the initial one who booked the chalet to stay for Sea Jam and invited her to join us as well, she really appreciated the gesture and even thank me with a little card. At the moment when i received the card, i had some mixed feeling. I've never expected to be appreciated for this little invitation that we've done.....but after reading her blog, the answers to my questions just start revealing.....

Her blog is an avenue for her to write about her family and in short, her unhappiness.....reading her blog makes me wonder why a gal like her, would be sooo 'depressed'. Maybe the word depressed is too much but it's really depressing to read her blog. And yet when you meet her, she's always full of laughter. And i really meant FULL of laughter as she has this laugh button on her that once initiated, it goes haywire....and hence, the impression she gaves me and her thoughts on her blog shows some hidden unhappiness in her that makes me rather worried for her....

That day was the day where i sort of drag her out, out the goldfish studio to talk to her....i'm not sure why did i suddenly do that but i felt that i want to talk to her.....she told me about the problems at home, vaguely, and at her studio where she took up a scholarship....after speaking to her for about an hour, i've concluded the following

1. One should learn to love herself/himself

Not that she doesnt love herself. I feel that although she has kept herself busy with things so that she will not think of the problems at home, probably in pursue of her own happiness, she hasn't realise that these are not really making her happy....In our pursue of certain things, i believe we MUST be happy. It's sad to pursue things we believed in and hope to achieve and yet not gain happiness from it.

2. To push oneself to achieve and score is a plus point. To push oneself too much and overdo it, is a no no....

She has aimed to be a tap dancer and not just a dancer who tap. that is why she has taken up a dance scholarship, a scholarship that she hopes will inject or widen her dance techniques that will eventually improve her tapping. She has faced loneliness at the studio and felt that she is dragging the class's pace for the fact that all other dancers are much more well versed in choreography of the dance and the techniques required of the steps. Although being the slowest and weakest in the class is a painful experience, but being the 'blacksheep' and not gaining the support from the classmates is worst.

I've experienced that, to certain extent, in my pursue of singing, back then when i was at laoshi's class. However, i'm fortunate enough to have encouraging classmates who will stand by you and guide you along. This is important. Being physically not skilled is a minus point, being mentally not guided is worst.....

It's good to push yourself, but you will need people to guide and 'accompany' you along. Otherwise, it will be a painful and slow taking experience that will not help you to achieve anything but dragged your spirits down.

Keeping one's spirits up and positive is important to survive!!!


3. Being well versed in all aspects is good, but it takes time and good planning

In her pursue to learn different dances to improve her skills as a dancer, she has forgotten something. That it takes time and good planning to be well versed in all dances. She has kept herself soo busy with classes that i feel, she has not been able to juggle all and give each dance time to learn and understand.This will result in being jack of all trades but master of none. And for the fact that she is not that happy, will only slow things down.

We should always planned on the number of classes we can take at a time with ample time and concentration given to each. Otherwise, we will just be very tired at the end of the week and probably not gain much out of each classes. Unless of course if we are in borne talented and fast learners (which sadly to say, not many of such people exist in this world), will we be able to juggle all and still score in each. Else, still advisable to take things one at a time.....


In the end, i received an sms from her two days later, saying thanks for sharing my thoughts with her...she feels that im making sense. Of cos, im delighted for being able to share and help her with the little time spent with her....Sincerely hope that i will see a happier Wei Wei, who smiles together with her heart and mind...

Shawnna's Wedding Photo

That's Kunjie, Me, The bride, Shawnna and Andy....Johnny din go...think it was a last minute backout and Shawnna isnt too pleased....

Kunjie and Andy is my JC classmate at CJ and we had lots of fun together in class singing.....

3 Hours Talk on the phone

Had a long tok with bc tonight.....it started with the normal complaints about work and boy, he has changed slightly...to complain!!! haha....he used to have the concept that no matter what happens at work, all should end once its end of work day....hence, sometimes its quite hard to know much about what happens at his work day. Unless with endless drilling and all....

Anyway, i've enjoyed the tok tonight though my eyes were filled with tears...tears of joy and sadness. Joy that i've shared my thoughts with him; sadness of how shallow our relationship is after 5 years together.

Few conclusions i've come about when toking to him

1. Relationship is not based on time together, quality counts

Though we have been together for 5 years, he doesnt understand me well enough. It could be due to the fact that he is not involved in most of the things i do. Be it Lindy, Singing or Guitar. He will accompany me when he can but definitely have missed out the different sides of me. Pity.....No matter how long a relationship is, what you do together, what you share with each other, how much you understand about each other really counts..

2. To plan for the future does not means to have a joint account, joint whatever

There are people who believe in having a joint account together to save for the future. I never believe in it. Why? It might be due to the fact with regards to my relationship at home and the many things i've seen money can do....Money becomes a sensitive thingy in my life. That i believe that a couple should never have joint accounts or joint effort to buy a car or whatever joints until they are legally married. This belief might be old but in this modern days when nothing can be certain even when you ROM, why do couples need to have a joint account? If they are serious and ready for each other sharing a same future, they can save on their own and combine forces when they are getting married. This will save all the unnecessary or unforeseen situations when a relationship is ended prematurely i.e prior marriage. Having a stable and strong relationship should be the solid basis for marriage.

3. Values that we see from shows will reflect on us

I was giving him some examples about how tv dramas have hidden messages that will make people realise about some values in life that we should take note of. You know of instances where after watching a scene and you go, "Aiyo, how can he tok like that to his parents", such scenarios. There are a lot of moments in the show where we will 'comment' and without realising that the same is happening to us. That is where we will always need to reflect on ourselves, a times after watching a show that brings up certain values. Those are important lessons taught to us.

4. Rejected man tired, busy woman will be tired too

He was commenting on one will feel a little tired after three consecutive failed attempts of dating me out and yah tired. Isnt it good that he wait readily for me when im not that busy? Me, a busy woman who get involved in thousand and one things in her life will ask the waiting man and jio him out so that at least they have time spend together.
My frens will go, "you soo busy, you jio him when you free lah.." or "isnt it good that one is busy and one is not so and then the busy one can jio the waiting one out? It complements, doesnt it?" In actual fact it does. But has anyone thought that the waiting one, who has been leading a simple life, a very nice one and stable one, can maintain his momentum...keep his life simple and hope for her to call and wait for her call and yet the busy one, has to amidst her busy life, make effort to call and date the other out? Isn't it effort too? It's a tough balance but i guess, being a busy one, and a girl, she hopes to be dated out too, by the other. And she hopes to be a small woman too....


Overall, i can't really remember all the conclusions that we've spoken just now to put it here but i'm really glad to have that conversation. To have a chance to pour out your woes and thoughts is always a good effort. Beats keeping all hidden inside, or not Spelt out.

Last of all, i just wana say, i finally told him about my blog and i hope he will understand me better. Happy reading.....

Good news!! Try and Try

Jing has gotten herself a new contract.....a contract that allows her to go to Taiwan for an attempt at the chinese pop scene there.....i m soo happy when i heard that....

Its really great to see and hear my classmate perform and get herself gigs and of cos, a contract.....

there are a lot of ppl out there who hopes to achieve their dream.....ppl who strive to have a glimpse of their dream....but how many ppl are really able to smell success? a small percentage....sad to say...

However, i feel that it's impt to at least make an attempt to set a goal, work towards it, feel the process.....The procedure might be filled with obstacles, but its definitely a process that allows the person to grow, to grow into someone more matured, and in some cases, more realistic....

But i guess, regardless of the result, we shld always be glad that we've tried. It's important to try at new things. Things that you might be afraid to attempt, things that might bring u out of your comfort zone....cos we'll never do what we can do until we try....

For her, she has tried tremendously.....been thru 'hell' and 'torture', been thru ups and downs...she has grown into someone more matured....and someone who glows much more from within.....

I really am waiting for that day, the day where i see her on stage, the day when i see her new album....

Ganbatte!!!

My New Dress...for Gunawan's wedding

Hmm....i find it soo nice that i must share it here....hehe .....

Im gonna wear this for Gunawan's wedding....

Well, i like weddings....it gives me the feeling of love and i always feel touched by the atmosphere at the wedding dinner.....and of course, its an occasion where gals get to wear nice nice and dress up......not forgetting that its an occasion where you can meet old friends that you might not have a chance to meet....

This is the second wedding of our lot to get married...and a very unique one i would say...cos Gun...is going to pick Lucy up from the hotel....but sad to say, a s it's a weekday, we are not able to join in the fun in the morning....BUT, we have not forgotten about giving 'evil' ideas...hehe....

I'm attending another wedding tomorrow and its Shawnna's. My JC classmate....cant wait to see the rest of the classmates and know how they are..

well, that's all for now...hehe

Life...

Life is NEVER a bed of roses....If life is that easy, one might be lazy and taken things for granted....

Huixian was smsing me that day that she is sian with all the 'sian' things that has happened to her these days.....Till she is sort of lost and not sure of what she wants...

However, i believe that all of us, knows what we want, what we like and what we hope to achieve. Upon focusing on our wants, we will meet a lot of obstacles and test along the way that will prolong the direct path to our aim. This in turn will cause us to rething and relook at our wants..."have i been unrealistic? maybe its just a dream. I've past the age" and all these little self demoralising words. Then, we start to change our aim to something deem more realistic....in the end, with all the changes, we start to get lost...

So are we really lost?

I remembered Ernest love music...he has always wanted to start a band. But due to the work nature and all the shit at his previous company, there are a lot of things he is not able to do. Finally when he managed to leave his then job, he started to expose himself to more music, learn theory music and how music is form and lots of others including start to scout for his band members, one fine day, he formed his band called BlackForest, played at numerous events, received good feedback and he is happy.

I once told him about my dream. That i hope to be able to sing for others, need not be a singer, it can be a ming ge can ting singer and i'll be happy....he say, then start to expose yourself....

There are a lot of opportunities out there and its really up to us to plan our move. We might not be able to quit the current job and start a new one. WE might not have the time to learn extra stuff. WE may not this and that....

The fact is, procrastination is not gonna take us anywhere. we have to start exposing ourselves or move little steps towards our aim in order to start the ball rolling. If we never start to move, it will always remain as a hope...

So if you have a hope, make it happen.....no matter how long it takes...

Joke of the day...Francis and Me together?

Haha, this idea came about by Peter one day while standing outside the lift

(Charles, Francis, Peter, myself and i think Shelby was there)

Peter: Ey, both of you always go makan...scarly one day become jie di lian
Me : (Both eyes roll) huh, then you and Charles also mah...
Peter: Its different, we both guys mah...
Me : Me and Francis also different mah. Francis attached, me attached..so not possible...
Peter: Never know....
Me : Not possible.....anyway, i'm not older lah....i'm younger

This Peter ah....always like to try to tease me.....aiyo...i was explaining to Jordan about this scenario and i was telling Jordan, where got possible the both of us.....whoever is reading this and hearing how i commented about francis, will know that this is NOT possible....

We can be good frens...but BGR, no thanks...

Like i always say, there are a lot of good guys on the streets, but that doesnt meant that all good guys will have chemistry with you...

so, moral of the story, its more important to find one that clicks with you and has what you hope for in a partner...must be realistic wants and not those ideally wants like, tall, handsome, muscular and all....please, lets be practical....such guys on the streets will either be gays or taken.....hehe

24Oct....Cheesecake making....first attempt!

Well,

Deepavali is a festival for the Hindus......It's the festival of lights.....however, on the eve of this public holiday, 2 of my girlfriends and i have gathered together at FF's place to stay overnight for a drink and make cheescake!

I'm a cheesecake lover but has never tried making one myself. There are times when i've tried my colleague's masterpiece and i'm really amazed by the cheesecake makers....its really nice..be it the exterior or the taste of the cheesecake itself....so i'm rather excited about making this cheesecake....Though our main chef will be Weizhen and i'm not sure how good her skills is, i must admit that i believe it will definitely be an interesting experience!!!

The following night happens to be Jerome's birthday and we've decided to invite him to try the cheesecake....haha....though we do not know the results, but i'm sure it's the thoughts that counts mah...imagine your friend making a cake for you, heartwarming siah....

So with this, let me introduce the ingredients of the dish.....

For the crust...
1. Main ingredient, digestive biscuit


Firstly, crush the digestive biscuits in a plate with a spoon till it's fine and enough to fit into a tupperware where you want to make the cheesecake





2. Margarine

Mix the margarine with the crushed digestive biscuits so as to create a softer and stickier base that enables the biscuits to stick together and act as the crust




3. Sugar

Add a little a sugar into the base mixture to make it sweet

With all the three ingredients and steps, press the mixture into the base of a tupperware evenly






Tata....crust done....next, the cheese itself....

1. Cheese



Need 2 boxes of this. When they are soft, mix the two boxes together





2. Oreo cookies



As we are making an oreo cheesecake, you will need a package of oreo cookies. Crush these cookies and add to the cheese mixture





3. Whipping cream



Seriously speaking, i've no idea why we need this but chef Yee says the other time when she is making the cheesecake, this is one of the required ingredient. Anyway, we added this to the mixture in order to make it look like the texture that Chef Yee has seen before.



After adding all the part two ingredients and mixing it, it looks like this



Haha! looks absolutely disgusting right....eeee







So...after mixing and it is sort of ready, put it in the tupperware on top of the crust and place it in the fridge.....


Once it is ready...(how do we define ready, when its 'hard') take out the cheesecake and cut it into the desired slices....

our final product



Haha, knows what i think it looks like? Yam on Sweet potato!!! haha

Though it does not looks nice, it is definitely tasty!!!




And now introducing the other two chef other than me

Chef Yee











Chef Sik










And i don't have a photo on me working on it not because i din do anything, but all the photos were taken by me! so of cos no photos of me at work....

Come to think of it, i've never place my photos online and has remained 'hidden'.....

So.......let's leave it as status quo

ps. weizhen, if you reading this, i still think we need gelatin lah.....hehe

Bangkok 07Oct.....cont'd

The second day started promptly with breakfast at the hotel cafe and it is Continental Breakfast kind.....food where i had when i was in Melbourne. I dun really enjoy this kinda breakfast....cos for me, its really just cornflakes in milk, bacon, wedges and nothing much....boring

Then we were off to our offsite meeting...it was held at crystal room if i still remember correctly....and the meeting room is not really within the hotel premises cos its located at the basement where you have to go down the escalator and down to the basement before you are able to find it. Guess the layout is due to the age of the hotel....

Meeting was ok....Our GM was generous, giving away cash prizes with every question he ask....the meeting was like a presentation by all the different managers and the most long awaiting one was by Vivian, our Aspac Sales staff. Have long heard about her being good at toking and i'm curious about how her presentation would be. True enough, she has the Sales type of presentation, really good with words and i like her tone.....but i must admit that this lady is daring....daring in the sense that she can be rather straight forward with her words and not really afraid of offending anyone...steady....

I thought Marilyn wasnt the weakest speaker of all the Managers....i guess Operations staff are more operational and are people who make things work and are not 'presentation' people.....

The most interesting part of the meeting was where Greg decides to have a little personality game. He gave us four animals and four corners which which corner represent each animal. We were to stand on the corner where we think our personality meets the animal's. The four animals were rabbit, lion, monkey and owl. Based on my personality, needless to say, i classify myself as a monkey. Then we were to list out all the characteristics of each animal and present to the floor.....There were laughters here and there and i though our 'rabbit' Adrian really is like a rabbit. The bunny teeth, the way he toks .......its fun and interesting to see if a person you perceive the person to be is really what the person is....

The meeting finally ended with photo taking session and lunch at the same cafe.....

i must say that lunch was better than breakfast....

Of cos, after lunch was SHOPPING!!!

And now, other things that i've bought



This doll is those dolls that you see in movies where they prick with a needle at the hated enemy....

Bought it for a pack of about 10 at 100Baht






This pair of sandals on the right is a Schroll sandals.....Soo cheap...
only 250Baht....almost 10 Singapore dollars only....

bought it at Central Departmental store






And this set of clothes.....i bought it at Bobe tower.....This place sales clothes from warehouse...guess how much i bought this set at?

175 Baht....can u believe it!!!


Of cos...i din buy this set only....bought a total of 3 sets x 2 cos its for this two babies......

Introducing the two cute little gals....Amelie and Kathlyn....Thats Amelie on the left and Kathlyn on the right.....arent they cute.....

Okie...thats the part one of the 2nd day.....stay tune and more updates and pictures will come......

Things i've bought from Bangkok

Hmm, tot i'll show 2 of the things that i've bought from BAngkok before telling all about my experience there......

This is a handphone decor that you can hang on your HP.....the big head and mouth looks cute man....





This shoe i bought it for 290baht....cute ...just nice to replace the one that i've thrown away





more to come..............

Back from Bangkok!!! 1st night 06Oct

It was a very busy day in office...for the four of us, SK, KS, MP and myself, we were definitely not in the mood to work.....as the minutes tick away, it was finally time to set off to the airport from work....

However, the day had began with my little xiao mei telling me that she has left her passport in her hubby's car and her hubby was off to sail. Her hubby was a regular with navy and was sailing then....there's no way to locate her hubby as once sailors are out at sea, only life and death will need emergency contact of them....shit....our tickets is a group ticket where there's no way to book her on the first saturday flight out to bangkok....in other words, deviate from the group....

i remember her happily planning and toking away on where to go and all...who would have expect that to happen. she was in tears already and i cant possibly scold her...told her to keep trying to locate the spare key to her hubby's car or sms her hubby hoping that miracle will happen....

the day pass and it was 5.30pm. we are setting off at 6pm and her fate is somehow sealed. Just when we tot all hopes are gone, suddenly she told me that she found her hubby. Hubby will bring passport to her, and another fren will send her luggage to her at the airport. We were praying that the two angels will get to us in time and luckily, we were able to claim the boarding pass and as luck was with her, we were all on the flight safely to Bangkok....

Phew....what a day!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My first flight on Singapore Airlines

Believe or not, its really my first time on SQ. Took Eva Air to US back then, Thai AIrways too BAngkok, Cathay Pacific to Hong Kong and yah, none on SQ!

I felt the leg room for Economy class were wider as compared to the previous aircraft equipment i took. I was fidling with the remote control and magazine to have an insight to the in flight entertainment offered by SQ> There....decided on The devil wears Prada. Generally, nice show and i'm impressed with the Movies on demand as this feature is as good as watching movies at home on VCD or DVD player where you can rewind or forward to the particular scene you have missed. Amazing......

Food was ok. It was around the mid autumn festival so dessert came with a mini mooncake. Din try it as it's not snow skin.

Not a bad experience......
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bangkok new airport
Bangkok's new airport looks like Star wars....a tot i have.....the airport is mainly transparent with glass and see through panels that make it looks big. Basically, the new airport was much bigger and cleaner....

after collecting all luggage of the whole bunch of us, off to the next task. To locate our thai tour guide. Oh man, the airport is packed!

Finally found the guide and boarded the bus, only to find that the bus driver is new and not really familiar with the roads at the new airport. Delayed a bit here and there and finally arrived at the hotel, Holiday Inn Silom after 40 mins....

The new airport is located furtehr from the town compared to the old airport and hence, anyone planning to go Bangkok, do take into consideration the distance before making any plans.....

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Supper

By the time we settle down after checking in at the hotel, it was about 12++ in BKK. Though late, we decided to have shark fin's at CHinatown. After gathering a few, we were off to Chinatown in a few cabs. Luckily the previous time in Bangkok, i've recognise the location to tell the cab to let us alight. Just have to tell the cab to go to Yaowarat at White Orchid Hotel. There's a whole stretch of food stalls there that sells food late at night. At first, we tot that the streets in Bkk during the coup will be dead but, hmmm.....it seems normal....you dun see soldiers here and there or shops closed. Look normal to me...

after walking along the road and deciding where to eat, finally settle at this place call nam sing. Its a restaurant that serves Chinese food, not to mention Shark's fin and Bird Nest. I'm never a fan of Bird's nest and hence, settle for the 300Baht Shark's fin. The shark's fin there were so so...a little diluted i tot but acceptable....

After supper, it was back to the hotel as we need to wake up early for Offsite meeting the next morning....

................................to be continue

Bangkok trip

Well,

This offsite meeting seems to have met with a lot of obstacles. Started with the Bangkok Coup. Trip has to be postpone till 2 weeks later which is this week. In the end, when i tried to issue the ticket, the airline did not link our reservation to their system properly and as a result, i had to void the ticket altogether.

Seems to tell me that we should reconsider the trip or at least, go pray to the deities for safety

Transparency...

It's amazing how one fellow can treat someone that used to be quite close to become sooo transparent that even if he is physically near, not even a smile. Seems like strangers huh?

My conclusion. Worst. Strangers will give a smile at least.

Irritating.

I'm not sure why this has become to this....its becoming ridiculous. Guess by the time he has tot through, its my turn to ignore.

Over the week....

Well, my trip to Bangkok was cancelled at the eleventh hour due to the coup. I'm not really sure of the reason why but i guess it might be due to the uncertainty...Good in a way, cos i'll not miss a guitar class and yet i can watch SI today...

SI
Hopefully HAdy will win....i think this season show case a better 2 finalist...better fight....
Jonathon has a very stylo look...those rocker type....Hady reminds me of Taufik...Hope i get to see a super duper show tonight

KTV on Thurs
It was a all girls session with Nikki, Adelyn, Jiaen and myself. Short of Rong Biao and Jing. Jing have a performance so....ROng Biao, the busy man had to attend a birthday KTV at the other partyworld and hence only came for finale for like 30mins?

Hmm, Nikki's singing has improved a lot....i find that her singing has more soul than Adelyn....Adelyn's voice seems more at the back and i guess, she din sing as much as compared to the past..Jiaen the powerhouse, have soo much lung power, she can sing as loud without the mic!!

The session is fun and we were even singing the songs that LS made us sing then...Those memories...

Preparations for Laopa's wedding
Its Guoqing's wedding....on the 14Oct....Im the emcee again....This is my fourth attempt....

Being an emcee is very important. After the first attempt at Winson's, i realise there's a lot of different type of emcee...to be a well prepared, read the script one...that's easy....to be one that can seek attention from the crowd and bring up the atmosphere, that's the challenge....Till now, i've only attempted to be the first...That one is rather ok....Nothing too difficult...the latter will take good timing, experience and not forgetting a good partner....so....lets see wat type i'll become on that day....

Met up with Guoqing, Ernie and their 'sisters' for that day to discuss and have a look at the restaurant. Its held at OCC at Yishun. Then i saw their work for the dinner. Self designed table numbers, some flash display and all and all. Yesterday, i saw how these two ROM couple interact..Can see that E is the one that's leading the relationship...well in a good way and direction i would say...GQ is now more sensitive to girls and i can see the electricity in the way he look at Ernie....GQ is soo comical now, will make very funny faces and so and he told me about how E will hint to him on certain things. Guys are blockheads (some) and need a lot of guidance to understand girls. That time when i have a talk with the both of them, they gave me a lot of examples and guidance. Yesterday, what i see is E though asking for GQ to be more sensitive, she did do her part in the relationship. And that is what im lack of, to certain extend.

Soo hard....tiring...its hard work....

Guitar class
Yesterday's guitar class allows me to discover certain things about my classmates. We are learning a new song now, Jay's 晴天。 This song requires both plucking and strumming. And boy was the strumming hard...those up up down down pattern is driving me crazy. And the class was a little disturbing cos with 5 guitars, its crazy. Dareen is late again, this time better by 15 mins....but this guy hor, think he has played this song before, so he was strumming away and we cant really hear what we strumming. Class is a bit too many different standards and i think that he being the ace in this song, should have the courtesy of playing softer!...late and play soo loud...argh....Juwind and Freda are not soo good with the plucking but think Juwind seems ok with the strumming pattern. BAsed on the 爱我别走, seems like Juwind have the least practice.

I realise that in order to have an effective class, the students play a super important part in preparing before they come for class. Like our guitar class, if all of us make effort to practise prior coming to class, things might be much easier....But of cos, preparation takes technique and knowledge of how to prepare. Previously when i was preparing for my recording, i din have enough knowledge on what is called really being prepared. Hence, the first and only recording took almost 9 hours!!! and not completed! can u imagine all the time wasted? sigh

I guess in life, there are a lot to be learnt and it does help alot if all do their part. But of cos, if you are the one that knows how and what to prepare, it also helps to guide those weaker people into moving in the correct direction....

Time to makan.....

20th September 2006....happening day

Well, early in the morning, heard the news about Bangkok's coup...and to think i'm going to Bangkok this weekend on company's trip...sigh

MP came around to ask if im still giving the go ahead and given much thought, i chose no...and boy, am i proud of myself...haha..y? simply cos i think that in certain situations, it takes courage to say no. Actually, im not really looking forward to this trip neither am i dying to forsake the trip due to the coup, its just simply stagnancy i guess...in the end, after much persuasion, i just agreed to tag along.

Today was the night to watch Forbidden City - Portrait of the Empress. It was a musical by our very own Kit Chan. Im proud of her, in the sense i admire her pursue for her love in arts. Be it Singing, Musical and all, she gives me the feeling she's soo good in it...

In the musical today, i went with my colleague. Took a bus cos she's lazy to walk and boy was it a bad choice. We arrive 15 mins prior to start time and hence, no dinner. My tummy are complaining that they are empty but sigh.....

And then when it was interval, she was not feeling well and decided to go home. Boy, i was hungry, cold and alone. Sometimes, things just dun happen the way you hope and its soo frustrating and hopeless

Luckily the show is good....those vocals....wow....wonder when will i be like them....

while enjoying the show, i realise someone looking real familiar on the stage.....isnt that jo dong...wow, i can even recognise her in the show though im not sitting in front....

you noe, its really very interesting to see someone u noe on stage performing. And whenever i see a good fren performing, im always soo proud of them.....i remember the time when i saw weizhen and brian performing at sentosa...i admit, i was close to tears....im touched...really....at these little things...even when i went to see jing jing at the hotel lounge singing...that moment was magical....

i guess, i admire Jin San Shun at times....she's soo simple and clear cut. Sometimes, if life can be that simple, isnt it great? but at times, life can be simple if you choose to look it that way.....and hence, simple life, lies in the way you define it.

I guess, in my definition, nah, life is not simple.

some thoughts......

Was listening to one of 同恩's song named 一个人遗憾。I especially like the chorus as it was meaningful. It goes

一刹那无奈 好过一次次失败
一点点愉快 要用一生来感慨
一个人失败 好过被世界推开

when i heard the first sentence, it seems to reflect on what B make me realise by making my status as a hi bye fren....i felt helpless...helpless as i was not given a chance to make a choice.....maybe chances are given, but not literally...i guess in life, there are always chances here and there. BUt it really takes the brilliant eye and clear brain to spot things at times. Guess i din spot the warning signs in time and the volcano erupts....

somehow the three sentences seem to reflect things in life...at times, little happiness are not spotted in time and one will only realise one day, suddenly. when that happens, prolly years have passed and looking back, you will realise that i should realise that long ago and enjoy the happiness there and then. Realising the 'mistake', you will regret, sigh, on how we can miss out such minor details to brighten one's life.

Failure, happens all the times to human. At times, we should be thankful that we failed before. When one falls, he will realise or should realise the mistake and take note to prevent future happenings. It's fortunate that each of us fail once, fortunate that you realise that you are wrong, that someone tell you of your mistake, that people bother to tell you your mistake, rather than them ignoring you. THe feeling of being ignored is bad, it's a feeling of failure. Can make one helpless and hurt their ego.

I guess, no one is perfect. It's ok to fall at times. But very important that someone pull you out from the quicksand and highlight and guide you along. These people are important people. They can be your parents, close frens, relatives etc.

So if you meet such person, be thankful

'Court' session.....

Today had a meeting with all the TLs....this meeting has been one of the most exciting one i would say...one that i was warn against, a preampt that someone might question my ability as a TL....

introducing the following main characters:
1. MP - my Ops Mgr
2. HA - the attention seeker
3. AA - the loudspeaker

--------------------------------------------------------------------
MP : "Now that the time is late, let's go round the table to finish up the meeting. AA, anything to say?"
AA : "i wanted to clarify why..............."
---------------------------------------------------------------------

the story spin into a debating session

---------------------------------------------------------------------
HA : "WHY DID YOU SAY THAT I'M UNAPPROACHABLE? IN WHAT WAY AM I?"
MP: "No....I've never said that...."
HA: "You spoke to AA......"
AA: "Yah, when i ask you ........, you mention "when has XYZ become like HA, soo unapproachable?"
MP: "No, AA, i've never said that. Y would i say that, i mentioned its dah dah dah dah. THen you say dah dah dah dah. Right? then after that dah dah dah dah dah...."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh my goodness!!!! it's already 10+pm and they are arguing about such things? Can't stand the loudspeaker and attention seeker. Throughout the whole meeting, HA have to say this and that after everything that MP mentioned and AA seem not to understand what MP is saying and that the words can get twisted. Somehow, i think a boss would NEVER say such things especially to AA or about HA. Like MP say, she wouldn't put her head on the chopper board!!!

Somehow, i think that AA and HA do behave like kids. FOr me, though im a very straight forward person, i DO NOT use this character anyhow in the office especially to my boss. This is something i feel that should be carefully thought of and planned before you comment anything to your boss. You wouldnt want to place yourself at a losing end or at a position where you will get yourself slap. I've gotten that before and know how it can get to. I salute to both and worry for them as the session has really shown certain character of them, a bad one i think. These 2 will definitely be the last on my list to approach or share anything. Too risky. It's like playing with fire.

There is bound to be certain politics in the office, and it's really an art to tackle such things. I remember someone told me once that humans are the ones that's terrifying. For the reason that human can do more damage to another as compared to meeting a ghost. And that is something i've learnt and seen today.

Hence, moral of the day, be real careful of what you say, when you say and who you say to. After being a DJ, i've even understand greatly what every little thing i say can lead to and that everyone has to be responsible for what they say.

Beware!!

However, i'm glad that i escaped the meeting will no knifes on my back or chest....phew!

Bad day

Well, for some reasons, i thought i should classify today as a bad day

The characters for the below
SK - my direct supervisor
KS - another supervisor
MP - operations manager

1. I was late for work and right at the face of mp.
2. The particular company that was not informed of how the transaction fee was charged based on walk in. Though it was not a direct impact on me, somehow, affected me.
3. SK told me that boss ask her to relay the msg to me about the frequency of my personal calls...and that try not to have late nites that will result a shagged looking me, first thing in the morning
4. KTV session planned long ago from a total attendees of 9 to 3. Sian...somehow, had a feeling that KS and MP went along to 'please' me or have an agenda to tell me
5. Day ended with SK joining us for dinner only and not ktv....sounds fishy and i have this weird feeling
6. We had dinner together and the agenda came.

• Team leader's meeting coming up and i was warned about someone might bring up the topic of 'whether some Team Leaders justify their designation' and in short, that refers to me
• My punctuality
• My personal calls
• Justification of my pay - Peter feels i'm still not up to being a Team Leader
• I'm warned of how i speak to Peter....

7. Mood a bit spoiled but i forced my tears to stay in the tear duct.
8. Had a kinda crazy KTV
9. After all, felt bad and try to call BC. Call was not picked up nor returned. Sian

Now to elaborate, i'm feeling down for the following reasons.

Team Leader was not a designation i was informed of prior to accepting the offer. I admit i placed myself at a danger zone full of mines and due to carelessness, i had to work hard to prove myself. There are some people who will question my capability as a Team Leader and i felt that this responsibility should be left on MP who should tell the rest of the Team Leader, why my designation is the same yet different. It's different literally where my designation has this Operations Support after the word Team Leader as compared with the rest. Dont they understand that firstly, i was a green bird when i was given this job. If i can easily rised up to the designation, it shows that the experience gained by other TLs over the years to scale to this designation is peanuts lor. Can't stand that woman.....argh....attention seeker...

I've thought of how i should make my exit from the company. From the day that my bond ends, i should move on. Dont think this is a good enough environment to scale. Or maybe i'm still too stubborn about certain things and refused to submit. Dunno and i dun wan to noe.

I better start planning and make my exit simple and respectful.

As for now, time to sleep first.

Nitez

the week

Well well,

Last week was rather ok. Work has generally settle down more or less from the busy times where i can finally start to clear my own work....ok lah...MP is back and hence, hope that she will ask for justice to my previous promised pay....

Had fling with wz and were toking about b...seriously, when ff were toking about b and at the moment where ff mentioned that me n b are now hi bye frens, my heart sunk again....its that feeling of expected and hearing it again...sigh...at that moment, i sms mx and tell her about this stupid b and how sian it is that this friendship is going to...i guess, i really have to consider forgoing this fren as its really hard to maintain the friendship with someone like b...

anyway.....

wanted to share with all what i've completed for my two nieces for their one month



This is a 300 pieces jigsaw puzzle done specially for the two princess....idea is to put their photo in the middle where baby minnie and mickey are....

i did it in about 3 hours.....achievement !!!













And this is something i've collected over a few months.....it was francis who help me with the 7 and i managed to get the last one at a single try....haha...

With the box, arent they pretty?








It's rather amazing what little things can bring the happiness to one's life....simple gesture, smile, a tap on the shoulder and all....hmmm

So if you are one guilty fellow of not doing or showing any love or concern to the one beside you, what are you waiting for?

I'm celebrating bc's bday at sentosa tomorrow...will share the photos taken tomorrow......cya....

gathering with tb people

Today, had a little gathering with Adelyn, ah Biao and Jiaen.....Nikki and Jing was supposed to come as well but in the end, the former said something crop up and latter had to go for a rehearsal for her tomorrow's gig....sigh....

poor JE had to wait for 2 hours! i was caught up with the hotel reception and A was caught in a jam. RB called to say he will be late and soo all of us was late. It was a fun filled session with all the sharing about LS, KP, E, KW gossip and not forgetting SM. well, other than JE, all of us know about the gossips in tb, so for the one hour or so, it was a poor tb bitching session....

and i realised something about the people working for M. they are people who might package their words and present it nicely to the audience. It takes time to digest and truly decipher their meaning and whether they meant what they say. And for me, took 1 and half year of searching before i decided that hey, this place is not gonna fulfil my dreams....i'm getting out of it....

and i'm glad i did....God bless.....

FF msg me to ask me to give her a hug tmr....huh? what happen? checked out her blog and realised its about Shifu...well, Shifu is preparing to buy a ring....i guess the moment has come. The moment where she knows will come one day and this day will not be a pleasant and easy day. I guess in life, there's really a difference between expected and when something really happens as per expected. When something expected really happens, its like driving a nail right into your heart..."you nailed it!!!" It's painful.....

But i believe that at least, the ending and direction is clear. both parties know that finally, our uncertainty has come to an end. It's a relief at times. Look at things positively and you will see the light.

Ended the day taking a train with JE back together. She is in a new relationship 2 months old where both she and her bf are first timers. I've shared my experience an dknowledge about BGR with her...i think, when a relationship is fresh, everything appears to be fresh, nice, sweet, can be forgiven and understandable. But after 24months spent together, the relationship is infused with different components. The consideration for each party is still there, but most importantly, there are certain things that guys and gals need to understand about each other.

First important theory----Guys and Gals are really different. In terms of physical, mentally, spiritually and all....guys can be stone at times and need constant nagging and pointers to understand the gals' needs.

For me, i think gals are simple. you just have to understand that gals need constant loving, care and concern. Paise her when she doll up, give model answers at times and etc. see? easy right? hahaha

For guys, give them face at times and let them feel that they are in charge. I guess its an ego thing but giving them such 'benefits' are ok at times but at a considerable and acceptable level. TOo much of it will get their head swell. They are 'straight' beings where gals need to be direct at times. Tell them straight in the face what you want and of cos, to note the tone. Still need to give them face....aiyo...

anyway, i think today, i had an interesting gathering. Filled with fun, joy and laughter. It's a miracle how one gathering can turn out.

If you are being asked to attend a gathering, i would suggest to all to attend as one never knows what you will get out of it......

New discoveries...

Over the whole week, discovered some new 'theories'

Had a talk with ff on one of the nite and realised something....i like myself better when i listen more....

Over the years, due to some things, i wanted to be the initiator..hence, through the process, i've become more independent...and definitely more impatient..and prolly because of this, i talk more than i listen...and i happily 'share' with all around me about my happenings and grumbles....and i did not realise that this will create irritation with someone....b wrote in one of the email that he do not want to listen to all the office politics and all...*wake up call* It was after the talk with ff that i realised that b was really refering to me. All the while, i've talk too much that slowly and unknowingly, realised that i know little of some of the people close to me.....

Hence, i've decided to make myself a better person by listening more....

I guess, one will only know more and benefit more by sharing and listening....

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The next topic.....

b n i seem to have reached another limit of our friendship. or i should say that, our friendship must have been a shallow one. Y? cos he din really appear to be concern about the way our friendship goes. He called ff when ff reply his email to clear the air....i've always have this feeling that b and ff and wz friendship is a deep one...one that have gone through ups and downs...one that he treasure....through his little gifts for them on their bday....i could sense it....

hence, i guess, the little MY incident that happen that night has only confirmed to me that our friendship is shallow. One that does not have common ground. ff and b has at least yoga. wz and b has the passion for jazz and the music line....me? nothing i can think of now.

Actually, does friendship needs to have a common interest between the frens in order to justify the friendship. My answer? NO! y? cos i believe that if two can be friends meeting every week for many years, they must have develop something within and deep down inside as well that justify the friendship and this development would be different from the initial idea that brought the friendship together. in me and b case. the initial idea - lindy

guess i realised that its really playing with fire when one is light hearted towards another's passion.

i've always treated lindy as an avenue for me to showcase myself. and of cos, an avenue for being socially involved. it's something i've enjoyed, especially the people element of the dance.

so in order to make myself feel better, i'm ignoring his attitude towards me. His cold....

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actually i have soo much to say, but guess, tonight is not the nite, so that's all for such inner thoughts....

Primary School Gathering

Cai Huang was my 初恋情人 when i was in Primary 5. Can you imagine? My love life started when i was like 11 years old? haha....Actually, i do not remember much about why he was my puppy love then but it was definitely sweet. The long hours on the phone, and mind you, it's LOOOOOOONNNNNNNNGGGGGG hours, easily clocked 5 to 6 hours...toking about rubbish and nothing under the sky...haha....

Well, we lost contact for 10 plus years and i vaguely remembered that he sms or called me one fine day. From there, i got his msn and we msn at times....there was once where we were toking about the past. Actually i dun remember much from the past but surprisingly he did. Reminded me certain things and oh, a tape....At that young age, i actually recorded my rendition of "Miss you like crazy" on a cassette and gave him...haha....he threatened to bring it out and play to all the rest when we have a chance to meet but after a while, he admitted losing the cassette when he shifted house....phew.....cannot imagine that...well the only thing i have from him is a cup and his photo pasted on my autograph book. He has a very boyish look and i remembered that he was once being bullied by older boys cos he was rather small size then...

Well, yesterday, i had a primary school gathering and finally met him after say 14 years....it's weird that in such a small country, i did not met him once on the road but well, it's still fated that we managed to contact each other....i saw his wedding photos once when we msn and he still has the boyish features and handsome lah....haha...

So after 14 years, when i finally saw him, he's shorter than me, but still handsome...haha...the gathering in the end, had only 4 of us. Zhihao, Meihua, me and him. We had dinner at this place called Ministry of Food (MOF) at Marina Square which serves japanese food and were toking away....but actually it was just Zhihao toking away....he was toking about his work, his stay at London, the gals he had and blarblarblar.....Before i go on...must highlight that MOF service is not that good...the waiter and waitress are abit blur and mix up the orders. So, we werent that pleased with the service....

After that, went to cafe cartel at Marina Square...boy...it was the longest walk i took to go cafe cartel. Cos, Zhihao suggested going Breeko at Bugis and walking there....but he needs to buy a shirt for his Brother.....so we went up to a shop and he took sooo long to buy a shirt....pengz...this man is mafan!

then he leaded the way and we walk to citilink, cross the bridge to suntec and in the end say go milenia walk...arh!! we could have walk directly there from marina square....best part is when we were walking along the road, saw cafe cartel opposite and in the end decided to go cafe cartel....pengz....

so we spend almost like 1 hour there and LISTEN to Zhihao brag about the gals he had, how he two timed lah....show us photos taken in London and the gals he had....boring...

at the end of the 4 hours, couple of conclusions

1. Zhihao - Portrayed to be too over confident....it's supposed to be a gathering but it appears to be more like his sharing session....One who is not matured lah....too playful

2. Mei hua - not much to tok about...the whole nite she was rather annoyed with Zhihao.

3. Cai Huang - not tall, handsome, think he a bit sian, likes Milk Shake (Same flavour as me....STrawberry), and definitely more matured than Zhihao...

Well, conclusion...i'm glad to go...though it's pure Zhihao's sharing session, at least i get to meet Caihuang...to see if he has changed.... All the best frens...

Today's performance at WCT

hehe, today's performance was stressful man...

Y? cos both ff and myself did it with like 2 saturdays and 1 national day break practice and it's scary when one is not fully prepared...

msg ff early in the morning and told her that i'm counting down.....deep down, i'm really thankful to her cos i felt she did it for me...my performance 'itchiness' started since Sea Jam...thanks dear if you reading this.....i guess, such challenge can only be done by both of us as we are a bit nuah and not soo perfectionist....ask Ms You Win aka WZ, or B, the performance will never happen with soo little practice....

the day was packed with lots of work at the office but still managed to get to SRC at 8+....the crowd was good and quite a good mixture....

Started with a small lindy class and then performance on tap by brian......


Here's a photo of tap.....it's where one puts main emphasis on the tapping sound of the tap shoe and it's the kinda CHarlie CHaplin do...






Then it was me n ff....sweat man.....we were dress black and white, with caps and suspenders..(hmm is this how u spell it...ah....nevermind lah...) tot we look really like those new yorkers with caps and stylo milo...

Anyway, the performance started and ended in 2 and a half mins later.....the floor was slippery and there were only 2 thoughts while performing

1. Remember all steps
2. Not to fall!!!

maybe another point, that is to SMILE....it's really important especially after today's performance, that i realise a smile can work wonders....cos ff forgotten quite a bit of steps and acted along the dance to 'pretend' to do something special.....soo funny...but overall, i'm glad the reviews are good...thank god....

Cheers man!

Anyway, today is the day where we tok to B for more than 2 sentences since that incident.....great feeling....it's as if re-knowing someone.....

and i would like to say, b, you gave a more interesting class than S today.....keep it up!

part time DJ gig...flop

well, today finally receive a call from ah T to tell me that boss decided to take me down....

that includes my Saturday 9 to 2pm slot and 搏客达人 pre-recorded programme。

I've expected it....but that doesn't lessen the impact it has on me...i've sent numerous sms to BC, RB then FF. first to call RB....guess as he was the one who recommend me, prolly he really wants to know what happen...

well, i've expected it cos

1) Last sat, the minute i finish the 10am news slot, ah T da ge came in to say, 'huh, how many people did you say died in the typhoon in Zhejiang?' ....i knew it that its coming......somehow feel that i was being monitored....when he left the room, he said," pls jiayou. got quite a number of ppl commenting on your news reading...."

at that moment, a gong sort of strike me.....hence 10.30am 八卦流行乐 sound bland i think.....i've tried to keep the spirit up and hide it but i guess it sound not the upspirit....


2) That day when ah B tried to intro someone to ah T da ge, ah T said' is it like the last time that one? how's the command of mandarin?' The conversation happen in the room where im in and being sensitive, i thought it could be me that ah T was hinting.....

maybe i'm sensitive but i felt that cos i noe deep down my command of mandarin is not good as well...

my mandarin is not powerful nor bad. i can manage a full mandarin conversation of simple words without the influence of other language but i know that this is not enough....come on....you think being a DJ is easy? it's super hard!

actually, i've tot about quiting since i'm not up to it, not prepared, din improve much blarblarblar, but the procrastination kills......and in the end, i was asked to step down.....

Ah T mentioned that i din have to go down on saturday..that is like huh immediate dismissal? i din even get to say goodbye.....but on 2nd tots, gd too, i wouldnt know what to say too......

Ah B called me the moment i send the message and ask me about it.....and how i was, and whether my cancer nature is taking effect.....told him im rather ok lah....i know how much gold i have in the bag....so....

But this incident sort of gave me a wake up call......lessons learnt
1. Learn to say NO when you are ask to do something real time and when everything you say, is being heard by thousands and when YOU ARE NOT PREPARED or UP TO IT

2. Learn to work hard or at least strive when you have not say no to point 1 else, you'll just be smack by reality one day and well, who to blame? oneself lor.....

After the call, i email J n J, A chua, turtles and i got all replies except the one i'm waiting for.....sigh, although i know he is in msia, he is working, he might not receive the sms, he is busy, he does not know how to reply......but hey! i'm upset cos he din reply till 7+ in the evening.....

y does the reply always come late or sounds disappointing? reminded me of the time when i fell...the same type of disappointment.....

now that my saturday's morning are free, it gives me more time to zzzz.....ah B ask if i want to go on Sunday to be his guest again and if im free continue to record his programme too......well, i noe the disappearance is weird and that though i dun mind gng, i just dun feel like to do it, now.....need to sleep and forget.....

anyway, tomorrow's the day for me and fern to perform weizhen's charleston routine and we have to do it good....cannot throw face away..... so wish me luck...

i've move on....life is full of failures and one just have to pick themselves up and move on....

my little twin nieces

oh, think i've not blog for a very long time....

on the 26th July.....other than mx bday, it was the birth of my little two nieces....

i used to be afraid to carry little infants, but when it comes to these two, somehow the courage appear miraculously...


Presenting, Amelie!!! The elder one...










and....Kathlyn.....








Well well, both are 3 minutes apart and they are soo small and cute.....

But poor thing....they got chicken pox, together with my sis within 2 weeks of birth and are hospitalised....sis commented that they prolly got it in the hospital....and i've been advised not to appear as i've not had my share of chicken pox before.....

well, i went to carry them, feed them during their incubation period and god noes if i'll kanna....

keep my fingers cross.....

also, the hospital bill is killing sis....u noe, my agent had advised me to get myself a hospitalisation insurance just in case and that was wat i did .......never noe what will happen....so if you reading this and still not get yourself covered by a hospitalisation insurance...better start doing something...

definition of fren....

Well, today is a hi bye day...what happened???

was at JB for fling and saw b...ever since that incident, the friendship has never been the same...there is something weird i feel that either b is thinking about or a pending problem that has finally decided to surface....it makes me wonder..."How should we define Frens?"

we knew each other since year four in ntu....b, wz, ff and me...they were a gang together and i sort of broke the ice and squeeze myself into the gang and it has been like this for sometime....we are honest about the way we dance and all....it is a close relationship....

till that fateful nite...a casual remark by me to b sort of produce sparks or erupted the volcano....

he wrote me a long email about how he dislikes me as a student...how my actions were contradicting and so....its true and i admit its contradicting....i was enthusiastic about performing 'Flying Home' at welcome tea....but the afternoon practices after morning djing sort of took away the energy...plus we are learning the swedish way now, everything is sooo difficult and tiring....

and he is a very passionate person towards lindy....passion soo great that he can give up a normal working hours job to give himself the flexibility to dance... that he can argue with his dad and so on...

that's where at times, i think that the pressure and hopes he placed on us is great and when the fulfilment is not obtained, the disappointment is doubled...

now, b is smsing me and saying that he doesnt understand y all four of us are soo different and that maybe he shld find new frens with the same passion...

sigh.....

we must all remember that in life, there will be many people who cross our path....there are people who initially got together because of a common interest.....as lots of time are spend together to think and tok about the common interest, there should be more things developed in the friendship that deepen the friendship...and WE SHOULD BRAVE THROUGH this small hiccup....i have this feeling that he is insecure.....

i have no idea why and how the frienship has steered to such a direction, a direction that is cold and no warmth at all....a hi bye friendship...

sigh.........

Hopefully the storm will be over soon....

lindy

well well, something highlighted to me today....

Lindy has been very fun for me, always....i like it cos it's a happy dance...the people and the way the dance goes, the smiles and laughter makes one very happy doing it...however, it has come to a point that fling is more of a get together...its a little wasted to just go social and not learn from class....cos you can actually learn quite a bit from class....

however, the things the studio do to compromise the standard is sad....it becomes very commercial and the fine line they define due to a business mind between the good and poor is sooooooooo fine....i no longer worship lindy 4.......no longer have the urge to attend class...soo sad...

hence, i told ff today, i should take a break from lindy....the curve has reached stagnancy...

anyway, since that fateful night, it has sparked off quite a bit of things....saturday practise becomes no longer enjoying and fruitful for me, fling being get together session....

Sigh, what is lindy?....

Conclusion

Hmm....guess my frens are concerned what i've finally decided to do to my relationship....

last whole week since the tok with bc, has been a thinking week for me with lots of tots, lots of crying, lots of confusion going on...i cried that day after msning my fren regards to my relationship...he told me to quit....but deep down...i just feel that something is not gng to be right with this choice....

i spoke to laopa and laoma that nite....

"can i say something harsh to you", she goes
"go ahead...", i say
"i feel that you are holding to your ego...that's y you are not makeing the move"

ah, my heart aches....maybe i am....i've always been thinking, why am i the one to always take the initiative? why? why? why?

in life, one will lose their way...feel bewiltered and confused...just soo happen, i am now in such a situation...

however, after the discussion with them that nite, they taught me something....something about relationships.....

relationships is nothing but communication....to make things work for each other....to look for a person that is willing to go the extra step, to keep trying to make the relationship work...

when one is lost, the focus should never be on the problem. Who's at fault or whatsoever...cos in this way, nothing will ever get out of it....the important thing is the solution....how one should do to make the relationship work....

relationship is also about asking the right thing at the right time....knowing the difference between man and woman and accepting the other as he/she is....

"your next relationship will be the same if you never try hard for it..."hmm..i've never tot of this....maybe its true....and that's y i'm in 5 relationships till date....nothing to be proud of....but something really true about this statement....i guess, i should do something about the relationship...to convince myself to really make time for it...put effort in it...keep trying....

when it really fails after trying upteen times....then its ok to let go....

it's a coward move to let go even without trying......

well, in the end, nothing bad happens this weekend....i've decided to start my engine and work hard for it....learn to really love...

Wish me luck....

am i wrong?

have been toking to a couple of frens re. my bgr....i'm bugged for quite sometime...the thought of moving on and not drag on cos i dun seem to be fair to him...

though L.O.V.E is never fair, it has come to a point where all my consultants are telling me that i need to MOVE ON.....

we both tok about it on the eve of my bday pass midnite till the wee hours of my actual day....we cried...he told me that he's sure that im the ONE....but not sure if he can accept my style of living after marriage...

it seems like he DO think about our relationship, and that he knows we are not ready for marriage...i should be considered lucky....cos if he really do proposed to me one day when we are not ready, i dunno what i'll do...

told my 5* frens before that he's not planning for our marriage in the near future...no one believes...guess this tok has confirmed that im right..that i noe where my relationship is really at...

he told me that maybe he is dragging me down....maybe we should let go and we will each be more blissful if we split our ways....deep down, i've thought of that before...just that now is the time where im really thinking about should we move on...together or individually...

from the tok that nite, i noes he really loves me..he doesnt want to really change me...he changed for me....but me...sigh....i'm still the same....

the balance is tilted and the balance is no longer there....

i guess, it's time where one have to gather the courage to do something out of the comfort zone....one that will be painful...very....but one that will make two lives better.....

maybe, just maybe, i should convince myself once again that if we are really fated to be together, we will be in the future as well....

i'm tearing...wetting my t-shirt....it's been six years since i last experience this.....let's see if i'll be able to do it this weekend....God bless.......

surprise surprise surprise!!!

haha.....the eve of my bday...was a day with many many surprises...be it for me or for those who wana give me a surprise... hehe

Well...all started on the week of my bday....normally, i'm not too particular about working on bday as some believe that it is suay if the bday gal gets scolded on the bday....but i've decided to give myself a good break since company do give an exceptional day off (annual day lah) if your birthday falls on a weekday....

So....took leave on 23rd...

On the 22nd June, all of a sudden at around 10+, my receptionist called, "Clare, someone is here to see you, and when i turn to look over, wah....its a guy in shirt with a bouquet of flowers!!! It's BC.....wah...

Well, i was pissed when he missed the show the day before due to work and i was unable to find someone to watch it instead...

But when he came, i was melting inside....sooo SWEET!!!



my nice nice flowers....

(a bouquet, where a blur junior met along the way to dinner, said it look like 菊花. diaoz! cannot make it!!! cannot see ah)





hehe....and just when i was beaming inside....joey called to jio me lunch...but i have to go home during lunch as i 've forgotten to bring my hp out....so i suggested tiong bahru....

and just when i'm about to rush out for lunch, my receptionist called again!...argh........"clare, you've got visitor....." aiyo....tot there shouldn't be any? the next thing i know, the J n J company came with a guitar and a parcel for me....

well, for those who dunno, J n J is joey and jeffany....my 5* fren leh.....

they actually took leave to come and surprise me....hehe....soo sweet.....


steady ah my frens...last year when i learn singing, they bought me a toy microphone...this year, bought me a guitar when i'm learning guitar....wonder what i'll get next year? hehe



The best part is, they are soo pro that they even made a Delivery Order for me....made me sign somemore....these gals....

Well, in the nite, BC brought me to Bistro at Mount Faber to mum mum dinn....i kinda spoil the surprise cos he wana bring me to Mount Faber by cable car but i make noise and wana go home first cos i have to bring sooo many things to bring home! soo in the end due to time constraint, we had to miss the cable car....me the spoiler....

Dinner was at Bistro where its open area and its dark...romantic....he seems to have made progress and become less woody...shhh....

Dinner was good, with 2 main course and dessert and milkshake....i like the brulee more than the tiramisu...brulee is nicer and sweeter....but super expensive lor...the whole dinner cost 110++....杀人放火 man.......my GOD....

BC was busy....soo din had time to buy present....i'm not really disappointed cos i know he's real busy the whole month!! poor boy....all work and no rest....sayang....

we took a stroll down the road and was wondering how to make our way down....guess its either cab or by foot....but VIOLA!!! SBS actually have a bus up the hill...we first tot the bus is free but sigh, it actually cost a dollar....i thought its expensive since its only down the hill to harbourfront....how far can it be.....felt the pinch man....

in the end we took a bus back home.......................to be continue...